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a loved life Posts

And then….

To make matters worse to my raging allergic reaction, which I think now, is to blame on Diet Coke – I came to work today and I’m not even scheduled. ON A FRIDAY!


My pinkie is currently the same size as my thumb. I am allergic to something although what exactly that something is, I don’t know. I am itchy and miserable and it’s raining outside today. Hmph!


Last night i had a fairly detailed dream about someone who with much assuredness I can say I hate. I know, hate is a strong word. It takes more energy to hate someone than to not care – I know all of that but that doesn’t stop me from feeling the way I feel about this person.

Having said all of that, I am the kind of person who has come to strongly believe in the power of prayer. I believe in karma and postive/negative energy and universal law. I pray that God will allow me to arrive at a point where the disgust I feel can turn to just plain old apathy.

Where their name doesn’t make me cringe and their words don’t make my stomach quesy. I suppose in a perfect world I really wouldn’t care about the person, but the world ain’t perfect and neither am I. I feel good to be able to make at least a small conscious effort to want to remove the anger I feel about the person, I guess any progress is progress all the same.

New Music Tuesday

i used to be one of those people who rushed out every tuesday to get new music. my cd collection is quite expansive and i’m a music junkie in every sense of the word. in one of the towns i formerly lived in, i shopped so much, they started to give me the employee discount. yes, it was quite the habit.

since i’ve moved the washington d.c. metro area (read: less money) my music purchases have tapered off to next to nil. in fact besides & bmg, i’ve only bought about 4 cds in the last 18 months. does this make me less of a music lover? no it just makes me someone who loves musicly dearly but whose money is better appropriated to things like, oh rent.

today i bought two new cd’s ; common’s be & shelby lynne’s suit yourself (LOVE her so much) and i have to admit that the giddyness of cracking open that oh so hard to open plastic and reading the liner notes was satisfying. i haven’t even listened to the discs yet (although i’ve had common for about a month) but i feel good about owning them and supporting artists.

what i can’t get behind are record companies who seek to insult my intelligence and my wallet by pricing cd’s beyong my admittedly poor means. music is for sharing. what’s the fun of loving an album if no one else can share in your affection? this isn’t some tyrannical essay about the spoils of music file-sharing or my attempt at legitimizing my own musical theft; but i have to wonder why, if the music industry really feels good about the products that they’re releasing, wouldn’t they want to share with consumers


the only things to eat in my house are cheese (of course), lettuce and some ben & jerry�s coffee ice cream. i need to buy groceries worse than life.  if i eat one more sandwhich from a seven-eleven or one more bag of lay�s potato chips, my body is going to have a giant upheaval and give up on me.

i�m off being the world�s greatest sister-in-law. to make the quandry of actually going to the grocery store even worse is that my sister-in-law (whom i�ve never met) is coming into town tomorrow night and will be staying at my house on saturday and sunday. this is bad because for a number of reasons:

  • i don�t like to clean, cleaning is for losers.
  • to combat me not cleaning, i have to have our cleaners come in � goodbye money.
  • after a 14 hour workday today, i have to go home tonight (and get up early in the morning) to do my pre-clean. what? i can�t have my cleaners think i�m a complete and utter slob.
  • somewhere in between there i need to shop for something sister-in-law friendly to wear (poor excuse to shop, i know) and not forget to balance my checkbook/pay the bills.
  • so, if i fall off the face of the proverbial earth