Yesterday I went to the doctor to discuss what we think are panic attacks. They are brief but terrifying and thankfully I’ve only been having them a few days. I love my doctor, she is an impossibly nice middle-aged woman who shares slightly too much with me which engenders me loving her that much more. She said I was probably the 5th or 6th person she’d had through the office yesterday who came about anxiety – I don’t want to be all misery loves company but that made me feel so much better. I had an ekg and my heart is fine which is good to know because if you didn’t know – one of the super cool things about panic attacks is that they often make you think you’re having a heart attack. I consider myself a very practical person and yet I just couldn’t quite get out of my head enough to not have those “OMG EYE YAM DYING RIGHT NOW!” thoughts – so I went and I’m fine and if you have panic attacks – please go see your doctor. Please.

Today I’m going to put clean sheets on my bed and maybe hang a different set of curtains. I find that since my work space is in my bedroom, I have to change things pretty regularly or I get restless. I’m hoping that in our next space – I’m more able to define my spaces and I can not have my “office” in the bedroom but we make do for now. I am so thankful that the weather is breaking. Winter was so incredibly brutal to my spirit – I don’t think I’d realized just how bad I needed this sunshine. It makes me want to do all the things and today I woke up and I felt – happy and ready to start to the day. Vitamin d, you’re amazing!