Dancing On My Own
One of he things that growing up hopefully teaches us is that independence is vital to our happiness and ultimately to our survival. I'm not exactly sure when it is that we learn to exist in pairs and packs, but there is something to be said about someone who thinks and acts on their own. It wasn't until my 30th year of existence that I actually ate in a restaurant alone. And I remembered thinking that people must be thinking what a lonely loser I was to have to eat my meals alone. There is so much ego in that mindset, though. I mean – am I really so special that 1. people would notice or that 2. people would care to postulate why I was alone?
Quite simply, there is no harm in being alone. It affords us the opportunity to be alone with our thoughts and to only have to deal with our own internal "noise". I think about all of the things I've missed doing because I was scared to do them alone and it's just stupefying. Last night, Robyn was in town along with Kelis and because I didn't want to go alone, I waited too long for my friends to pass on the invitation and the tickets sold out.
When I remembered that the show was actually last night and I saw people talking about it, I was mad at myself and I felt this overwhelming regret. Who needs a sidekick at a concert? I love my friends and I enjoy their company but I also feel that same way about myself. So, this is my public and personal commitment to not pass up things I want to do just because they have to be done alone – from here on out, if need be I'm a one (wo)man wolf pack.
Here are two songs I could have heard live if I weren't so stupid sometimes. Please right-click and save as: